SileX blogja

Hi guys,

First of all, a big thanks to everybody who commented on my knee situation or messaged me with advice or good wishes. You were great and I am grateful and proud to be a part of this community! Here comes a short update for those who asked.

My surgery was on the 10th April in a city about one hour from Budapest. While the surgery itself went well, there were multiple complications arising afterward. First there was an unexpected swelling around the knee the morning after the surgery that had to be drained manually. That was a horribly painful experience that I don't wish for anybody (and there are people that I don't like so well).

Second complication started later that week, after I have been returned home with pain in my calf and a child fist sized hematoma forming in the area. The surgeon prescribed additional medicine and I had to stay in bed for three weeks mostly unable to move. Ordinary things like going to the bathroom or taking a shower have gone from trivial tasks to difficult or impossible. It was the worst time of my life and I am very grateful for my friends who kept visiting, keeping me company, bringing me food, emptying my bedpan.

In some sense it was a truly heartwarming experience to see how many people are out there whom I can rely on.

It took three weeks for the hematoma to clear up enough so I could start physio. It was the first time after the surgery that I could take a look at my leg without the bandage all over it, and what I saw was shocking. I was warned that I would lose muscle mass in my legs, but no amount of warning could prepare me for what I was. It looked like my leg had deflated, there was so much muscle atrophy. I wanted to cry, but I didn't because once you start with self-pity you don't know how to stop.

Physio is a bitch.

The first few sessions were horribly painful as layers of cramped and solidified tendon and ligament had to be forcefully loosened up and mobilized. I was walking with crutches for weeks.

In mid-May I could ditch the crutches and cane, being able to walk short distances on my own. In June I could start stationary bicycle training as part of my phsio. I started going to the gym every day to spend an ever-increasing time on that contraption. As long as I was there, I also started using the gym daily for upper body training, a powerful need to get back in shape asserting itself.

The present situation is that I can walk short distances without too much pain and I'm starting to regain some of the muscle mass that I lost. I put on a some fat while laying in bed and being inactive for over a month and I will do my best to get rid of it. I still cannot run or do any stop-and-go style sports. Those things are still months away. Prognosis is that I will regain full function around January 2018.

Thank you all again for all the encouragement and support. I promise you all: I will be back to wrestling as soon as my surgeon clears me! I will update again in a few months.

Dear friends at MeetFighters,

I want to tell you a story about an accident that happened to me. This is not a pure self-pity story; I will tell you the bad part first, but if you bear with me, I will tell you the good part. Deal? Deal. Let's go.

So it happened in October that I tore a ligament in my right knee during a match. I didn't know that was what had happened at the time though. I just knew that it was agonizingly painful and I couldn't continue the match. Or walk unassisted. In fact, my leg seemed to be useless for anything but giving me pain.

The next morning I went to a chimp dressed as a doctor. The chimp then did what they do: it ordered the wrong test, then based on the wrong test it drew the wrong diagnosis, and based on the wrong diagnosis it prescribed the wrong treatment. The wrong treatment made a bad situation worse.

Note to self: don't trust chimps. They are assholes.

So suffice it to say that my knee was not improving much. By the time I got to a doctor who actually knew what he was doing, I was due to travel out to Australia, where I spent some weeks limping around but otherwise having a splendid time. Thanks to all Aussie MeetFighters friends who agreed to meet up with me even though I couldn't really give them anything resembling a good competitive match.

Then back to Budapest, getting an MRI, getting the second opinion and finally in December, getting the first surgery for the knee to clean up the broken remains of the ligament.

Then came the physio, and finally I progressed enough that the surgeon gave the green light to do the second surgery, the one that would replace the ligament with a graft taken from my hamstring. In about six months' time, I will be able to run again and regain most of the function that was lost in October.

All in all, this little adventure would cost a bit more than a year of my wrestling life. This concludes the bad part.

The good part starts in December when I met a guy. I gave up on finding a boyfriend who was A) local B) having that ne sais quoi and C) into wrestling. It turns out that if you settle for two out of three, there's an entire world out there, and in that world I found someone special for myself. He didn't seem to mind that i came to the first date on crutches. He saw me for myself and still decided I could be good for him. For that I am happy and grateful.

As part of my physio, my therapist has recommended that I do an ever-increasing amount of indoors cycling. Not having an indoors bicycle at home, I joined a gym that was within limping distance from my domicile. Since I had to go there most every day to spend some time cycling without getting anywhere, I also started doing some upper body workout every day. Turns out that if you do that, it actually helps with your physical condition! By February I started regaining the muscle mass I lost due to inactivity and not being able to do jiu-jitsu anymore. By end of March I was starting to feel stronger than I was before the accident. I improved enough for my friends to notice and compliment on my condition.

In conclusion, I miss wrestling terribly, but I am not unhappy with where I am at in my life. The second surgery is coming. It will be painful, and I will have to walk with crutches and start physio over from zero again. But then, slowly, I will get everything back, and in October, I will start fighting again stronger than ever.

This is the story of my Knee Situation. I will be here to chat with you guys and hear your stories, and when the surgeon gives me the green light to do so, I will jump at the chance to wrestle you again.

Stay strong and happy wrestling! :)

I was having a discussion the other day about what is motivating me in a match, what it is that I like about wrestling. I will now make the outcome of this discussion public.

My priorities are:

1. Safety. (Nobody gets really hurt beyond some possible scrapes and minor bruises.)
2. Fun. (This is a big bag of everything, includes good moves, learning stuff, whatever else makes the match enjoyable.)
3. Winning. (Remote third, only matters when objectives #1 and #2 are secured.)

These are the Laws or Robotics in that #1 takes an absolute precedence over #2 and #3, and #2 takes absolute precedence over #3. For example, when given a choice between winning and safety, I am happy to lose.

So now I put it out there. Happy to hear your thoughts.

I got caught in a storm yesterday, slipped and fell off my bike while crossing tram tracks. Note to self: tracks wickedly slippery when wet. I was lucky, as I have no broken bones or internal injuries. I didn't even bang my head. Looks like all these years of training taught me breakfalling well enough.

I did, however, lose some of my skin on the arm and leg, so training and wrestling are off the table for some time now.