Knees and Hugs

Dating is hard for me only because I don’t fall into the cookie cutters on what gay men expect. I straddle the lines of masculine and neutral but would say that I’m more masculine-skewed than any fem lines. I’m subdued, for the most part, not at all possessive of the general toxic masculinity. Not your typical gay personality, but I’m also not fully “straight-acting,” either. My hair is regularly multiple colors; I don’t scream straight. Even though I can and will fight you, and I used to periodically go to the shooting range when I was a Fed. DADT times, though.

I'm a pudgy 6'3" dude, I'm fluctuating between 245 and 239 lbs while I'm away from training (but I'm returning in about a month), I'm a workaholic and my ability to host is very limited to others doing things or me booking a hotel. But, I still get the occasionally fighter dude that's willing to be my punching bag, and that's a good interim for now.

Anyway, it’s usually hard for me to find fight-boys to date because I tend to frequently encounter the “turned on by fighters” that do not actually fight themselves. I want a sparring partner on occasion, and I don’t mind if a guy is willing to learn to fight because that means I’ll eventually have a semi-competent partner. And it allows me to get coaching itch out of my system, and possibly gain a training partner. But it’s the non-fighters that bother me. I don’t mind it because to each their own, but these are just my little hangups. I’m not a well-trained fighter–very much on the novice end for Muay Thai and intermediate for boxing. But it’s not just a turn-on, it’s my form of exercise and self-defense, and I take it seriously for the most part.

And then I really enjoy contact with another man. That strength of a good cuddle while watching TV or a nice tight clinch with solid body punches in a “foreplay” round of sparring is such a friendly draw for a potential mate. Which is why I like the importance of dating another fighter. I don’t want to have to pull punches or not have a helpful technique executed on my own person. Posers and non-fighters are fun, but it’s limited fun. I might be wrong, and that’s fine, but again, self preferences.

I’m not calling out the posers here, I used to be one until I gathered up the courage to make the transition into training myself. Now I’m just an intermediate-noob out here looking for the boyfriend/husband/fight buddy/snuggler/handler that’s gonna help keep me happy while I help make him happy. It'll happen, there are other like-minded fighters out there, we just gotta find each other.

In the meantime, there are just having casual fun while I'm traveling with other guys, both for training purposes and to get my need to be intimate with another man out of the way.