Ironbull's blog

Ok, I have to make an embarrassing admission. I watched Sex and the City. And thoroughly enjoyed it, despite its tacky stereotypes, unlikely plots and shallow characters.

For all of its vacuous bleating, one point was well made. With men there are no mixed messages. First impressions endure. If he's into you, he's going to make it happen. He's fixing dates. He's booking the mats. Blood is flowing to all the right parts of his body. You're going to meet.

If a positive is so unambiguous, its absence can only point to a negative.

So, when a guy is being polite and engaging in noncommittal chat but not moving towards you, he's just not that into you.

When you suggest a meet and, for the second or third time, it doesn't happen, he's just not that into you.

When you mutely look at his profile again and again and he doesn't say hello, he did see you but he's not that into you (and what you're doing is a bit creepy so please stop).

If he cancels, it's more likely than not that someone or something more promising came into his option sheet. He's more into it than he's into you.

You would think that we, as men, would know this.

Think how much time and thwarted expectations could be avoided if we let this in.

If he's not that into you, you are not going to get into his pants. Cornering him at a group meet won't help either. Nor will staying in his face n the hope that he changes his mind. He's just not that into you. Move on.

I really hope I practice what I preach....